You Want Sperm Sharking? You Got It!
Here at PLS, our only concern is giving our readers what they want, and one way to find out what y’all want is by looking at the search engine terms which have led people to our site. For example, when my co-blogger Sam found that some unlucky soul had stumbled upon our blog after searching “peg leg women fetish,” he wrote up a post to satisfy that reader’s need. (This increased our fetish-based search engine traffic tenfold.) We’ve had several odd phrases show up in our search engine terms recently, including “oh its sperm,” “tennisbreast” and “michael jackson invated kids.” But the most perplexing to me were “sperm sharking” and “sperm shark,” which together have so far contributed three views to our site.
The phrase was obviously directing people towards “Forget Shark Week, It’s Sperm Week!”, Sam’s post about a Polish woman who claimed that her daughter was impregnated by sperm floating in a swimming pool. It’s a fascinating article, but it never actually mentions anything called “sperm sharking.” Being a lifelong resident of Puritanical, uptight New England, I had never heard the phrase before, and assumed that the people searching for it had been bored thirteen-year-olds throwing words together in an attempt to find new jerk-off material.
However, Sam did some research and uncovered the truth. Take it away, Urban Dictionary:
You know, it really is a beautiful thing that we learn just as much from our readers as they do from us. It makes my heart overflow with joy, and then with vomit. However, as Sam discovered, he and I weren’t the only ones unfamiliar with the concept:
Yes, just keep telling yourself it’s about whales. Whatever helps you sleep at night. By the way, I can see sperm sharking being a part of Japanese culture, and not because Japan is stereotypically the most perverted country on the planet. There’s just something ninja-ish about the whole activity. It seems like sharking successfully requires speed, stealth, agility, stamina… Truly, it is the sport of kings.
Anyway, I’m sure that many of you reading this article came here expecting some hardcore sperm shark action, and I do not intend to disappoint. I’ve scoured the internets looking for a demonstrative video, and I finally discoverd one. A word of warning, though: This clip is not for the squeamish.
If you think you can handle it, click here.
Pegleg Spinners: Your one-stop fetish shop!
What else would you, the reader, like to see posts about? (Please don’t bring up anything involving sperm…)